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Cecco Angiolieri and "S'i fosse foco"

Cecco Angiolieri (1260-c.1312) was a Sienese poet. He is best remembered for his wonderful sonnet "S'i fosse foco". Below is a translation by me, and another by a computer, which produces a surprisingly effective mixture of translation, mistranslation and non-translation.

The poem is interesting from a philosophical point of view. It is a series of nine subjunctive conditionals. While the first eight have false (in most cases, necessarily false) antecedents ("if I were fire," "if I were death," etc.) the final conditional has a true, indeed a necessarily true, antecedent ("if I were Cecco"). To emphasize the strangeness of a subjunctive conditional with a true antecedenct, however, Cecco inserts after it the only verbs (literally, "as I am and was") in the poem that are not subjunctives or conditionals.

Here is the original:

S'i' fosse foco, arderei 'l mondo;
s'i' fosse vento, lo tempesterei;
s'i' fosse acqua, i' l'annegherei;
s'i' fosse Dio, mandereil' en profondo;

s'i' fosse Papa, allor sarei giocondo,
che` tutti cristiani 'mbrigarei;
s'i' fosse 'mperator, ben lo farei:
a tutti taglierei lo capo a tondo.

S'i' fosse morte, andarei a mi' padre;
s'i' fosse vita, non starei con lui:
similmente faria con mi' madre.

S'i' fosse Cecco, com'i' sono e fui,
torrei le donne giovani e leggiadre:
le zoppe e vecchie lasserei altrui.

Here is a translation by me:

If I were fire, I would consume the world;

If I were wind, then I would blow it down;

If I were water, I would make it drown;

If I were God, t’would to the depths be hurled.

If I were Pope, I’d have a lot of fun

with how I’d make all Christians work for me;

If I were emperor, then you’d really see -

I’d have the head cut off of everyone.

If I were death, then I’d go to my father

If I were life, I’d not abide with him

And so, and so, would I do to my mother

If I were Cecco - as in fact I am -

I’d chase the young and pretty girls; to others

Would I leave the lame or wrinkled dam.

If you visit this site, you can find three other translations, including one by Dante Gabriel Rossetti.

Here is a curiously evocative computer translation:

S' i' was fire, would burn ' l world;
s' i' it was wind, the tempesterei;
s' i' it was water, i' I would drown it;
s' i' it was God, mandereil' en deep;

s' i' he was Pope, allor I would be giocondo,
che` all mbrigarei Christians ';
s' i' he was ' mperator, very I would make it:
to all I would cut the head round.

S' i' was dead women, andarei to mi' father;
s' i' it was life, I would not be with he:
similarly faria with mi' mother.

S' i' was Cecco, com' i' is and was,
torrei the young women and leggiadre:
the cripples and old other people's lasserei.